I've been carrying around a lot of stress and worry and general disproportionate bad feelings about the latest round of condo drama for about the last week and a half. (I think it's almost over...)
So on Saturday evening I went to bed early, then woke up at 8 a.m. on Sunday, which is uncharacteristically early for me. I went to the bathroom as usual, and realized that I was physiologically done sleeping, but I still really wanted to be in bed under the covers. I couldn't explain why, I just wanted to snuggle up in bed more than anything else.
Well, I figured, it's only 8:00, I'm usually still asleep now, it's a Sunday, I'm getting back under the covers!
So I snuggled up in my usual fetal position, surrounded by my nest of pillows, cocooned in my big fluffy duvet, with my sentries in position...and didn't fall asleep. I just lay there. My eyes didn't close. I just lay there.
But my brain didn't do anything. Normally if I return to bed after waking up to pee, I either drift in and out of dreamland, or start thinking through things that need to be thought through, or start mentally writing fiction. But none of that happened. I just lay there. Not sleeping, not thinking. Just lying there. For two hours. With my mind blank.
It was nice, very peaceful.
I think that's what meditation is supposed to be, and I've never done it before. I tried later to duplicate it on demand, and I couldn't turn my brain off. But this one time it happened organically, without my even trying, and I enjoyed it.
Interestingly, the only time I've ever done visualization was also during a round of condo drama. Maybe this endeavour will prove to be mind-expanding...
3 comments:
It does indeed sound like you accidentally meditated. And for two hours!
If you could figure out how to do it on demand, it might be a great stress reducer.
Good luck with your condo drama.
Might be catatonia
If catatonia is willing to limit itself to convenient times like early Sunday mornings, bring it on!
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